( I originally posted this on 08 OCT..sorry if some of it seems dated!)
Hello Professer Peabody here, with my boy Sherman (Hello!) We have set the Wayback Machine for the Future..Here is the NewYork Post Morning Edition for 01 Nov 2008 !
Tonite, in Her highly publicized much anticipated "NASCAR RALLY for Guys that Have the Hots for Me and Their Wives who are grateful that I am unreachable (and NOT THAT FLOOZY FROM THE BAR !) and Everybody else that is a TRUE CHRISTIAN and LIKES TO SEE THINGS DIE" (Sponsored By ExxonMobil, Halliburton, BP, and DIEBOLD"we deliver your vote") The Former Governor of Alaska (Removed from office last week for influence peddling, Abuse of Power and Tax Evasion) Opened the Rally by Announcing Her Running Mate
(following the Tragic "Gullible Gulch, Ohio Town Hall Meeting" When an Angry and Troubled JOHN SYDNEY McCAIN III Viciously Attacked and Pummeled with his Clenched Fists ,The 87 yr-old "Cookie Grandma Gertrude Mumps" after she had the gall to inquire " You're HealthCare Plan ,Johnny Could You Explain it to me ...I'm Afraid I missed something?"[The assault only ceased after , according to Mumps " I had to STOP the BEATING and THE SCREAMING " YOU'RE DRAFTED...YOU'RE DRAFTED" So ,I used the Pepper spray that Helen's Boy Travis gave me Two Christmasses Ago....I NEVER DREAMED HE WOULD HAVE THAT STROKE !"]
......MIKE HUCKABEE to the Appointment of My V.P. ! This will Balance My Ticket ! You Betcha !" Palin Then Followed with a BOLD MOVE. "ALSO AND AGAIN I Would Like To FORMALLY Announce the Change of Name...FROM the REPUBLICAN PARTY....TO...THE GUN'S n' GOD PARTY ! I LIKE to think this is the Kind of MAVERICK Move and RISKY Business I am also and again SO WELL KNOWN FOR in the Repub......GUN'S n' GOD PARTY ! " The crowd went wild. " This is Good, You BETCHA ! But First, and Again, Also we have a SPECIAL GUEST....The VERY REVEREND BISHOP MUTHEE !!!!" The Crowd was barely controllable with glee.
At this point this Reporter had to admit "SHOCK AND AWE " as a Young Woman was dragged on stage bound in 40 feet of steel chain, led by the African Bishop!
[ The Woman was identified as "Whisper Lurking" a 34 yr-old wife, mother of young twin girls and owner/proprietor of " Organic Health Foods and Random Healing Crystals" a small business in Springfield.]
The HOLY MAN then Violently Ripped a Crystal Pendant from young Whisper's neck, held it aloft for the audience and proclaimed " I NAME YOU WITCH...Dis Here Stone PROVES IT !!!!" whereupon Whisper was heard to reply " I'M A WICCAN !....YOU STUPID *SSHOLE !" The Bishop Turned his Back to the young woman and decried " BURN HER !!!! " The Crowd then Began Chanting " BURN , BABY , BURN !!!". As the Flames Crackled I observed a small weedy man with a Swastika Armband say " AWWW, Shucks ! 'atween all the Rusted Pick'em-ups and All those Boys in the Sheets waving the Confederate Flag....I couldn't hardly see nuttin' ! "
This was followed by Some more GOOD OLD-FASHIONED FUN....The "TAR AND FEATHERING" of the " COMMIE WELFARE CASE "
[ the VietNam Veteran of four tours "Lebraun James" was in fact , a triple amputee disabled in the service of his country.]
It was following this Folksy Fun that Ms. Palin had an "UNFORTUNATE WARDROBE MALFUNCTION" and lost her Entire Dress....Appearing in only a Black Leather Bra and Thong with Fishnet Stockings. I must Admit ...Ms. Palin seemed to handle it well......She "WINKED" at the MOB and the said " Well, And AGAIN, THIS IS REALLY WHY ALL YOU GOOD OL' BOYS ARE VOTIN' FER ME ! YOU BETCHA " as she slapped her thigh.
"GUN'S n' GOD " Spokesman "JOE the PLUMBER's HELPER" announced that MS. PALIN will Bring HER MORAL SUPERIORTY TO THE WHITE HOUSE...THANK YOU GOD !
INSTA POLLS NOW HAS the RACE..DEAD EVEN..with Palin making up the 30 point defict of 3 weeks ago.
This is for a DAY FULL of TROLLS..we need a good laugh !
SEMPER FIDELIS GOBAMA! GO BIDEN !
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