Organizing for America | Mary's Blog: Hardball Comments- Gay Marriage vs. Civil Unions

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Hardball Comments- Gay Marriage vs. Civil Unions

By Mary "NOT THIS TIME" in CA - Apr 3rd, 2008 at 2:11 am EDT

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Nothing about what Barack said tonight surprised me, he said outloud what most expected, "I don't support gay marriage, but...." This brings up something I've been thinking and voicing to friends and family since the 2004 elections; mainly, "let them call it whatever they want, as long as same-sex couples are allowed the exact same rights as heterosexual married couples."

Let the straight world have their mostly religious tradition and call ours "civil unions" or whatever better name we can come up with as long as everyone is treated on a level playing field. Who better to fight for equal rights for same-sex couples than a constitutional law professor and civil rights attorney. Barack understands the two truths that are core to this issue. One, that a huge glut of Americans older than 50 are never going to "accept" gay marriage because they feel it is too far from what they were raised to believe is right and two, that it doesn't matter what you call it as long as the rights of the individuals are vendicated.

If a same sex couple can win the right to file taxes jointly, make health decisions without a power of attorney, inherit property and join the host of whatever 1400 or so other laws a married couple is privy to, then basically, we've won, haven't we?

There are churches that will provide the appropriate ceremonies for civil unions, I've been to more than a few. There are whole denominations, UCC for the most part that encourage gays and lesbians to join their congregations and become as big a part of their "church" family as any white anglo-saxon Protestant could ever be.

Let them have the name "marriage" and let the GLBT community embrace and celebrate all the same rights in their own ceremony called a civil union; it's a solution where we all win.

~Mary

p.s. for those that do not know me and see on my profile that I am a white, married (to a man) mother of two, do not judge me because I am not in a same-sex relationship. I am outwardly bi-sexual (published in The Advocate and vocal in CA politics) and have been fighting for equal rights for the GLBT community for the past eight years with conviction and gusto.

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By Paul Apr 3rd 2008 at 3:39 am EDT

Since Mr. Obama supports a separate but equal status for gays and lesbians with respect to marriage rights, I would like to ask how he would feel if he lived in a time in which it was illegal for blacks and whites to get married, in which they were given different doors, different drinking fountains, under the guise of “separate but equal”. While Barack Obama may be one of the best among the candidates to choose from, I find it profoundly disturbing that he has the audacity to put forth the suggestion that separate but equal status is acceptable. The Supreme Court itself has said that separate but equal is not in fact equal. If he were to say, simply, that this is something that will happen eventually, and that most of America is just not ready yet, that would be easier to swallow. But for him to make the argument that he does against gay marriage, with a straight face, that is essentially the same as the argument used to oppress blacks in this country in the past, is shameful.